Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Don't Steal. It's Wrong.

In honor of my first victimization, I am going to write about what I would buy if I stole someone's credit card and went bat-crazy with it. Yes, my credit and debit card were stolen yesterday and someone had a heck of a day with it. $2000 later, someone had a great afternoon on my tab. Thankfully, the banks will cover those expenditures, but it can shake my faith in the decency in humanity.

Wishful Pilfered Purchase #1
Plenty of people who are lesser cooks than myself have this bad boy and I want one. I have wanted one for many years and I think this might be my birthday present for myself this year. We are to the point where we just buy what we REALLY, REALLY want for our birthdays. It will be mine.

Wishful Pilfered Purchase #2
I would like nothing better than to put a beach vacation on someone else's credit card. Tim and I were discussing if we were the type of people who could do nothing for a week on the beach or a cabin in the woods. We decided that we just might be. I would like there to be a daiquiri, margarita, or pina colada in my hand at the beginning of each hour on this stolen vacation.

Wishful Pilfered Purchase #3
True. I can't buy Barack Obama, but I could give him a big chunk of coin to help him defeat John McCain. Maybe I would buy some sweet t-shirts that would show people exactly where I stand in this election season. doesn't make sense to steal someone's credit card to donate the money. I am not a natural at this sneaky, illegal stuff.

Wishful Pilfered Purchase #4
This is my new desk. Right now, I have a lovely mission style desk but it is a bit of a monster. It is huge. I am transforming my mud room into an office and I need a slick desk and this cutie of a desk is at Crate and Barrel and wants me to buy it. I'll have to wait until I can steal someone's credit card because it just isn't a priority until then.

Wishful Pilfered Purchase #5
Well, I guess if you are going to steal, steal big. Why not buy a car. Since sitting in Dana's lil' Fit, I have pined for one. Not only for the size, but for the gas mileage. I would like to zoom around in this silver bullet and not have to pay for it.

Ah, but it just doesn't fit me. I am not a criminal. My sense of justice is just too strong. There is a right and a wrong. If I want these things, I must work for them. To steal for them is just not as satisfying.
To the one who stole the cards, you can have them. I still have the ethic to work and the pride to save my pennies.


Carm said...

Ewww... how awful. I just applied for a credit card earlier today and I TURNED DOWN their credit protection offer with its monthly fee.... was that a mistake? Did you have that? I'm sorry you had to deal with that mess. Yuck.

ellie said...

That is terrible you lost your cards, but I'm glad they aren't going to charge you for it.

I must admit - I registered for my mixer only because my friends were doing and it seemed to be the thing to do. It is a haus and I do enjoy it! Get one, you'll love it!

Mathman said...

I heard that someone actually made donations to Barack Obama's campaign using a credit card that he had stolen.

Momma2B said...


Seriously--that and identity theft are my worst nightmares. I'm so sorry that happened, but thank god the banks will cover it!

littlelinguist said...

And you can pull in front ways when you have to parallel park. --Dana B.