I am finishing The Girls Guide to Hunting and Fishing by Melissa Bank. It is a light read about a woman and her journey in her twenties, where she came from and where she is going. It's the type of book that a person can get through in a few days. It is the type of book that a person can read and not think twice about...with one exception. In the book, a character tries to enlighten the main character by sharing what Dante defines as Hell...
Hell is proximity without intimacy.
Is it just me or is that powerful to anyone else?
If we step back and think about our relationships, how many of us are living in this special type of Hell? Not that I have some deeper insight into the human heart than anyone else, but I certainly have insight into my own process. I can't stand relationships without intimacy. It doesn't fit like a tight high heel shoe doesn't fit. I want to fix it, get intimate, connect until it does fit.
I shared this idea with a few people. They either felt the importance and implications in their own lives or they completely dismissed it. I am not talking about the physical intimacy between two people, but rather, the emotional intimacy between two people. This intimacy can ebb and flow too. I have had relationships where the friendships and feelings are so important and strong that a day doesn't pass without talking or listening to them. Then, with that same friendship, time passes quickly, without a notice that you no longer feel the need to talk things over with him/her.
Maybe the worst kind of Hell is the kind where a person reaches and gives of themselves to have intimacy with a person...friend, family, colleague...and there is no one there who wants to receive it. Is the giver in Hell? Or is that person who refuses the connection?