Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Number Two


I want to discuss something that is a little private, but as the famous book says, "Everybody poops". A phenomenon, really...or more of a mystery.

I usually leave topics of bodily functions out of the daily blog, but this is such a curious topic that I would like some opinions. Don't feel embarrassed about it, "Everyone poops". Let's not assume that this is a new low at the Midwestern Position.

I was walking in a craft store with my friend Marisa when she had to use the restroom. She made the comment that craft stores always make her have to go to the bathroom. I agreed and added that I usually have to use the restroom when I am looking at cards at a Hallmark store. We tried to come up with a connection between the two that would yield such a strong reaction from the both of us. We decided that it must be the paper products. Then, my theory gained strength when another friend told me about her need to use the restroom when she goes to the bookstore. Again...PAPER PRODUCTS! I bet I could test my conclusions if I went to a party store where they sell paper plates and cups. Maybe the Staples would be a good lab environment for this paper and pooping theory. What do you think?

10 comments:

me said...

I am a lurker here (rarely post) but I think this is VERY common!!! For me, it's just any retail store. It's a joke with my fiance and my family now. It's pretty much always a given if I'm at the drug store, grocery store, mall, or any other retailer I'm gonna need to go. Pretty much know where all the bathrooms are now too!!! :)

Reddog said...

I would have to totallay agree. I always have to use the bathroom when I am at the library or the Hallmark store. Maybe one reason is, because we tend to be at these store for a very long time, so eventually we have to go to the bathroom.

shelly said...

paper products or not, i am not much of a public pooper. but this theory could explain a lot about the bathroom book issue, of which i so strongly disapprove. perhaps some people NEED to have paper products in the room. i am not one of these people.

Rhiannon said...

Your theory is very true for me at the Hallmark store. I have actually left without buying everything I need to because I need to rush home to the bathroom (my Hallmark is not connected to a mall so no bathroom close by). I have not noticed it at craft stores, but that's because I don't spend much time in them.

Eyes said...

That's too funny. I never seemed to experience this but it doesn't mean paper affects all people the same LOL. Very funny!

From reading your other posters, I must be the "odd one out".

I keep my business private, at home. I hate going out in public! I also hate hearing the "noise-makers" when I run in to pee. Ewwwwww!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Target stores are the instigator for me!

Anonymous said...

one word! B-U-C-A!!

Sara said...

I have no idea what BUCA means? Buca Di Beppos?

Anonymous said...

Okay, Sara said I could rant if I wanted so here goes....

I don't really have a problem with people using the bathrooms at the store. I mean, if you have to go, you have to go. However, public restrooms would be less hateful to me if people could just clean up after themselves. I kid you not when I say that in my 7+ years of retail, I have cleaned up more human excrement than I care to recall. I have cleaned it off walls, floors, doors, and backs of toilets. I realize that most of the people that do this are vile freaks but you'd be surprised.

A very well dressed, prim and proper woman once complained to me that the bathroom was "a mess." I went to retrieve the mop and the gloves but when I came back the bathroom door was locked. She came out of the bathroom and informed me that she couldn't wait so she "just peed on top of the mess that was already there." Thanks a lot! Now I've got 2 layers of pee to clean up! Moron!

So in closing, I'd just like to make a plea on behalf of all retail workers. If you have to go, just clean it up!
Jen

Mama Duck said...

I had a post on this awhile ago.

I think it's just the pure excitement of being out shopping...or the anxiety of what to buy? or the overwhelming sensation of it all?

Hits me everytime I'm at Target.
I thought I was a freak at first, but after responses to my post and reading this it's nice to know I'm in good company.