Monday, January 23, 2006

Would You Rather?

One of my favorite games to play with people is WOULD YOU RATHER. This is a game that is reserved only for the friends that I know have a psyche as twisted as my own. Few people would spend mental energy thinking and contemplating the impossible...or is it more the improbable...because, it could happen.

As you would guess, a proper game of WOULD YOU RATHER consists of three categories...

1. Unfortunate Choices-An example of an unfortunate choice would be "Would you rather have two little legs hanging from your chin or a little butt as a forehead?" Both would be unfortunate, but you have to choose.

2. Tough Choices-An example of a tough choice would be "Would you rather go on a date with Bruce Springsteen or Neil Diamond?" Both are fantastic and completely opposite, but both offer fascinating options. Ooooo...tough one.

3. Have-To Choices-An example of a have-to choice is something gross or cringe-worthy..."Would you rather have bad breath all of the time or fart every two minutes?" Yes, you have to choose one.

Some people have difficulty with this game because they think that if they answer, they are revealing a part of themselves. Well, yes, that is the point. You are either into Bruce or Neil. Yes, you might be judged by your answer, but you MUST answer. The best part of this game are the justifications. People have the craziest reasons why they choose one thing over another. Some might say they would fart every two minutes because they could just walk away, but come on...people are going to catch on. But if you have chronic bad breath, you could just be shy...or selectively mute.

The best version of WOULD YOU RATHER is when you are with a group of close co-workers or close friends because you can make it personal. You can use people that everyone knows. You can draw on past experiences. A veteran of this game will facilitate the questions and sit back and listen to the answers and avoid all answering of the questions themselves.

So, today, in the spirit of the 'game', I offer you WOULD YOU RATHER...

1. Would you rather wear Michael Jackson's bedazzled glove for one week without any explanation to your co-workers EVER or do the Moondance with a turn every time a phone rang for one week without any explanation to anyone EVER?


Anonymous said...

Oh My God!
This is hilarious. Seriously, I've been laughing for like 5 minutes imagining people at work doing the moondance when the phone rings! I'm going with the glove (as long as it wasn't actually on Michael's hand!) I think it'd be great to see the various reasons why other people at work thought I was wearing it. It would create an air of mystery.

Anonymous said...

And another thing,
I'd totally hang with Bruce over Neil Diamond--is there even a debate here!

firedancerdancin said...


the phone rings too damn much.

shelly said...

would you rather is my favorite game EVER! ("i've never" is a close second). for the record, i am thinking about wearing the glove with no explanation just for the hell of it. it's funny to wear a sparkly glove!

Courtney said...

I think I'd have to go with doing the moondance for a week. I love the shock factor of it, and I love it seems the perfect fit. Gotta love Mike for his contributions.

Dree said...

Glove, all the way. By the end of the week, everyone would think it was a hip fashion statement and they would all go out and buy one in order to emulate me. :)

Eyes said...

What a funny game LOL. Hilarious.

I'd choose the glove. The other seems much more insane to me :)

On the other examples -- give me two legs. Something about an "ass" on my forehead just doesn't cut it for me. I don't know why.

For a date, Neil Diamond -- simply because I think we'd have more to talk about.

And I'd rather fart every 2 minutes LOL. Who said it'd always smell?

me said...


Sorry, inside joke :) My DF LOVES Neil. Our first dance at our wedding will be a Neil song. Hmm...I feel a post coming on!

Rhiannon said...

Definitely the glove (much easier to hide). But I like the game. I'm going to ask my coworkers tomorrow on the bad breath vs. farting one.

Mathman said...

I too would go for the glove. I think my coworkers would get rather anoyed with me if I kept getting up to moondance every time the phone rang, especially since the woman in the cubicle next to mine has a phone that is almost constantly ringing.

Ryan said...

I'd love the hallitosis vs leaking ass question, given that I have both problems as it is. Bad breath is embarrassing, especially when you work in a service industry. However, farting is always funny, under any circumstances, but especially when in a stressful or serious situation.